Usually, the September international break makes folk lose their minds.
Alas, this year has been a different story. Where there is usually division and vitriol, there has been a united front in tribute to the ‘Barclaysmen’ of yesteryear.
We’ve had our own go at compiling a list of the great Barclaysmen of years gone by and those still in our presence today.
Before we begin though, some of you who are not terminally online will be wondering this question.
‘Barclaysman’ derives from the Premier League’s last sponsor, Barclays bank. It is an era defined by long-range bangers, Nike T90s, baggy shirts and grainy 480-pixel videos. It has been popularised recently by the Cultras Football Podcast.
To be a Barclaysman, you need to have a very specific skillset, an iconic feature (whether that be a moment of brilliance or a standout physical characteristic) and an adoration from the masses who probably don’t watch them every week. You also need a wicked compilation with indie music soundtracking it.
Being a Barclaysman does not equate to being an amazing footballer – there’s a compilation doing the rounds of Nani, which is ridiculous because he was an insanely talented player who had the titles to back that up.
For the purpose of this list, we are also selecting Barclaysmen who are associated to that specific club. For example, Adama Traore is a Barclaysman in the truest sense of the term, just not for Fulham.
Prime Barclaysman: Marouane Chamakh
Alexa, play: Midnight City by M83
Current Barclaysman: Riccardo Calafiori
Reason for nomination: Very handsome, very powerful aura, very easy to make a compilation without showing his football ability
Prime Barclaysman: Juan Pablo Angel
Alexa, play: Golden Touch by Razorlight
Current Barclaysman: Jhon Duran
Reason for nomination: Madman bagsman who did the West Ham ‘Irons’ sign on livestream
Prime Barclaysman: Ryan Fraser
Alexa, play: It’s Not Living (If It’s Not With You) by The 1975
Current Barclaysman: Philip Billing
Reason for nomination: Massive midfielder who’s like a baby Marouane Fellaini
Prime Barclaysman: Bryan Mbeumo
Alexa, play: Favourite by Fontaines DC
Current Barclaysman: Yoane Wissa
Reason for nomination: Present-day Mbeumo has outgrown his Barclaysman status
Prime Barclaysman: Pascal Gross
Alexa, play: Lost In Yesterday by Tame Impala
Current Barclaysman: Danny Welbeck
Reason for nomination: Still comes up with an incredible goal or goes on a fine run of form every now and then
Prime Barclaysman: Solomon Kalou
Alexa, play: Precious Time by The Maccabees
Current Barclaysman: Nicolas Jackson
Reason for nomination: (*after missing a sitter but still scoring a hat-trick*) ‘What is he like, that Nicolas Jackson?’
Prime Barclaysman: Andy Johnson
Alexa, play: Graffiti by Maximo Park
Current Barclaysman: Jean-Philippe Mateta
Reason for nomination: Insane purple patch, class chant, shirt tucked in
Steven Pienaar x The Coral#Barclaysmen pic.twitter.com/ZqCERgh23K
— Everton (@Everton) September 9, 2024
Prime Barclaysman: Steven Pienaar
Alexa, play: Well, listen to the video
Current Barclaysman: Dominic Calvert-Lewin
Reason for nomination: Dwight McNeil has too many shades of Burnley about him
Prime Barclaysman: Luis Boa Morte
Alexa, play: Taper Jean Girl by Kings of Leon
Current Barclaysman: Tom Cairney
Reason for nomination: The others on our shortlist have associations with Wolves
Prime Barclaysman: Marcus Bent
Alexa, play: Hate To Save I Told You So by The Hives
Current Barclaysman: Sammie Szmodics
Reason for nomination: Could score 15 goals this season, could score two, who knows
Prime Barclaysman: Muzzy Izzet
Alexa, play: Fell In Love With A Girl by The White Stripes
Current Barclaysman: Ricardo Pereira
Reason for nomination: Jamie Vardy is a Barclays legend, not a Barclaysman
Prime Barclaysman: Martin Skrtel
Alexa, play: Freaking Out The Neighbourhood by Mac DeMarco
Current Barclaysman: Darwin Nunez
Reason for nomination: This is Darwizzy we’re talking about here
Prime Barclaysman: Georgios Samaras
Alexa, play: Same Jeans by The View
Current Barclaysman: Jeremy Doku
Reason for nomination: Most Man City players are simply too good, but Doku treads the line between wonderfully impressive and fantastically frustrating
Prime Barclaysman: Federico Macheda
Alexa, play: Zero by Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Current Barclaysman: Jonny Evans
Reason for nomination: Well, he was on the pitch when Macheda scored that goal for starters
Prime Barclaysman: Laurent Robert
Alexa, play: Time For Heroes by The Libertines
Current Barclaysman: Miguel Almiron
Reason for nomination: His 2022/23 season remains an unexplained mystery
Prime Barclaysman: Pierre van Hooijdonk
Alexa, play: Stay Young by Oasis
Current Barclaysman: Chris Wood
Reason for nomination: New Zealand’s finest export just won’t stop scoring
Prime Barclaysman: Shane Long
Alexa, play: Crazy World by Aslan
Current Barclaysman: Ben Brereton Diaz
Reason for nomination: The heritage that has followed his career and the impending nonsense on the horizon at St Mary’s
Prime Barclaysman: Roman Pavlyuchenko
Alexa, play: Sticks ‘n’ Stones by Jamie T
Current Barclaysman: Richarlison
Reason for nomination: The pickings were fairly slim but Richarlison, despite his Everton blood, ticks enough boxes as a Spurs player too
Prime Barclaysman: Marlon Harewood
Alexa, play: Living For The Weekend by Hard-Fi
Current Barclaysman: Michail Antonio
Reason for nomination: At this rate West Ham will be playing him into his fifties
Prime Barclaysman: George Elokobi
Alexa, play: The Bay by Metronomy
Current Barclaysman: Matt Doherty
Reason for nomination: FPL legend
