NOT even Noah could handle this flood as Chelsea ran riot and made a mockery of the Conference League.
The two-times European champions were six nil up by half time with five different goalscorers as they sunk Armenia’s fourth best team at training ground pace.
What is most surprising is that qualifiers Noah held out for 11 minutes before going behind and even gave Chelsea a couple of scares on the biggest night in their short history.
Neither team belongs in this competition with twice Champions League winners Chelsea slumming it after a couple of crazy seasons following a takeover in 2022.
Minnows Noah have only been in existence for seven years and had to scrap all the way through three qualifying rounds and a play off just for the chance to fly 3,000 miles from their hometown to get thrashed under the lights at Stamford Bridge.
Blues squad players Tosin Adarabiyo and Marc Guiu scored their first goals for the club since signing in the summer.
And £42million Portuguese forward Joao Felix helped himself to two goals by the break.
Noah – named after the Biblical boat that finally ran aground on Armenia’s Mount Ararat – were holed below the water line very quickly and never recovered.
Tosin got the rout underway by heading in an Enzo Fernandez corner on 11 minutes.
Teenage centre forward Guiu made it two straight from the kick off when Noah’s defence crumbled after just three passes, allowing the young Spaniard to cash in and bury a shot.
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Chelsea ratings vs Noah
SUNSPORT’S Dan King rates Chelsea’s young guns after their flood of goals against Noah.
FILIP JORGENSEN – 7
Kept out shot before floodgates opened at other end. Made other sharp saves, including late brave one. Looks a solid No 2.
AXEL DISASI – 7
Out of position for early Noah chance but in right place to head in third. Good link-up with George on the right.
TOSIN ADARABIOYO – 7
Recovered from shaky start defensively to open scoring and his own Chelsea account. Steadier after the break.
BENOIT BADIASHILE – 6
Like Tosin, not entirely convincing as Noah created a few first-half openings, although made one good block. Also better in 2nd half.
RENATO VEIGA – 5
Couple of early mistakes, one of which could have been costly, set tone. Not as impressive as in previous ECL games.
ENZO FERNANDEZ – 8
On his own in midfield in the first half yet was able to provide three assists, two from corners, and look very comfortable.
TYRIQUE GEORGE – 8
Teenage winger made most of first senior start, beating opponents at will and sending in dangerous crosses. Worked back, too.
CHRISTOPHER NKUNKU – 7
Looked less hungry to tuck in to goal buffet. But went up front for 2nd half and scored twice after missing two good chances.
JOAO FELIX – 8
At it from the start, missed an early chance but then scored twice in a swaggering first half. Disappointed not to complete hat-trick.
MYKHAILO MUDRYK – 7
Much quieter than George until he cut inside and smashed home with confidence that had seemed lacking. Decent workrate.
MARC GUIU – 7
The 18-year-old striker worked hard as ever and got his reward, bagging his first Chelsea goal and stealing ball ahead of Felix’s first.
SUBS
KIERNAN DEWSBURY-HALL (for Guiu, HT) – 6
Some neat touches and won penalty for eighth Blues goal.
CESARE CASADEI (for Fernandez, HT) – 6
Found life as easy as Enzo, yet unable to make the same creative impact.
CARNEY CHUKWUEMEKA (for George, 68) – 5
Took a while to get going and missed decent chance to make it nine.
SAMUEL RAK-SAKYI (for Nkunku, 80) – 6
Teenager mostly composed on first-team debut but shot over bar with goal gaping.
FOOTBALL FREE BETS AND SIGN UP DEALS
Chelsea were three up and home and hosed by 18 minutes when defender Axel Disasi scored with his head in a similar fashion to the opening goal and from the same provider.
Blues’ skipper Fernandez then teed up Felix to score the first of his first half double with a threaded ball having dispossessed the hopeless visitors in front of their own area.
A shot from Felix cannoned in off a defender for his second just before half time.
And Mykhailo Mudryk, struggling to make his presence felt in the Premier League this season under new head coach Enzo Maresca gave his confidence a boost by curling in a classy right foot shot six minutes before the interval.
Maresca was so confident of victory that he subbed captain Fernandez at half time, replacing him with Kiernan Dewsbury-Hall. He could have left both off and it would not have mattered a jot.
More good news for Chelsea fans was the sight of star forward Cole Palmer walking comfortably pitchside before the game, offering hope he will be recovered from a whack on the knee at Manchester United last Sunday in time to face Arsenal this weekend.
Christopher Nkunku claimed his ninth goal of the season and Chelsea’s seventh of the night on 69 minutes when his first shot was blocked by the keeper but he kept his composure to hook home the rebound.
Chelsea are clear favourites to win this tournament outright. Their biggest victory in Europe prior to last night was a 13-0 win over luxembourg’s Jeunesse Hautcharage in the 1971 Cup Winners’ Cup.
They closed in on it at frightening pace when Nkunku made it 8-0 from the penalty spot 14 minutes from time.
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